Twelve monks were about to be ordained. The final test was for them to line up, nude, in a garden while a nude model danced before them. Each monk had a small bell attached to his privates, and they were told that anyone whose bell rang would not be ordained because he had not reached a state of spiritual purity.
The model danced before the first monk candidate, with no reaction. She proceeded down the line with the same response until she got to the final monk. As she danced, his bell rang so loudly it fell off and clattered to the ground. Embarrassed, he bent down to pick up the bell, and eleven other bells began to ring......
--
Nina and Liz are having a conversation during there lunch break. Nina asks, "So, Liz, how's your sex life these days?" Liz replies, "Oh, you know. It's the usual, Social Security kind." "Social Security?" Nina asked quizzically. "Yeah, you get a little each month, but it's not enough to live on."
--
A man was having problems with premature ejaculation so he decided to go to the doctor. He asked the doctor what he could do to cure his problem. In response, the doctor said, "When you feel like you are getting ready to ejaculate, try startling yourself."
That same day the man went to the store and bought himself a starter pistol. All excited to try this suggestion, he ran home to his wife. At home, he found his wife was in bed, naked and waiting. As the two began, they found themselves in the 69 position. The man, moments later, felt the sudden urge to ejaculate and fired the starter pistol.
The next day, the man went back to the doctor. The doctor asked, "How did it go?"
The man answered, "Not that well...when I fired the pistol, my wife peed in my face, bit 3 inches off my penis and my neighbour came out of the closet with his hands in the air!"
--
The model danced before the first monk candidate, with no reaction. She proceeded down the line with the same response until she got to the final monk. As she danced, his bell rang so loudly it fell off and clattered to the ground. Embarrassed, he bent down to pick up the bell, and eleven other bells began to ring......
--
Nina and Liz are having a conversation during there lunch break. Nina asks, "So, Liz, how's your sex life these days?" Liz replies, "Oh, you know. It's the usual, Social Security kind." "Social Security?" Nina asked quizzically. "Yeah, you get a little each month, but it's not enough to live on."
--
A man was having problems with premature ejaculation so he decided to go to the doctor. He asked the doctor what he could do to cure his problem. In response, the doctor said, "When you feel like you are getting ready to ejaculate, try startling yourself."
That same day the man went to the store and bought himself a starter pistol. All excited to try this suggestion, he ran home to his wife. At home, he found his wife was in bed, naked and waiting. As the two began, they found themselves in the 69 position. The man, moments later, felt the sudden urge to ejaculate and fired the starter pistol.
The next day, the man went back to the doctor. The doctor asked, "How did it go?"
The man answered, "Not that well...when I fired the pistol, my wife peed in my face, bit 3 inches off my penis and my neighbour came out of the closet with his hands in the air!"
--
Regards,
Shashi
Shashi
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